"I hope you find what you're looking for." Well, I found it.
This entire trip, from day 2, I've felt awful, sick, poisoned with unhappiness. I've spent the last two months struggling to understand why I am unsatisfied with my life, adrift in doubt. I've never been so angry with myself (how ungrateful and unappreciative can you get, right?) I've had dozens of conversations about happiness and the quest for The Dream Life and no one seems to think how I feel is unusual. It's a long story and I'll share it with you someday.
But here's the Breakthrough, hot of the grill:
I will no longer measure the value of anything by how happy it makes me. It leads to every sin and it is the rot I feel spreading inside me. Like measuring the quality of a meal by it's volume, I've been doing this all wrong. I've now faced the void of my gluttonous "unhappiness" and it needs to be sealed, not filled. For the first time in years I know the path I must walk. And knowing is half the battle.
This entire trip, from day 2, I've felt awful, sick, poisoned with unhappiness. I've spent the last two months struggling to understand why I am unsatisfied with my life, adrift in doubt. I've never been so angry with myself (how ungrateful and unappreciative can you get, right?) I've had dozens of conversations about happiness and the quest for The Dream Life and no one seems to think how I feel is unusual. It's a long story and I'll share it with you someday.
But here's the Breakthrough, hot of the grill:
I will no longer measure the value of anything by how happy it makes me. It leads to every sin and it is the rot I feel spreading inside me. Like measuring the quality of a meal by it's volume, I've been doing this all wrong. I've now faced the void of my gluttonous "unhappiness" and it needs to be sealed, not filled. For the first time in years I know the path I must walk. And knowing is half the battle.
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